by Muriel Larson
Also available in a podcast at:
http://talk.thelife.com/blogs/experience/kindle/2008/02/26/transformed-by-christ-and-counseling-rays-story/
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“What’s wrong with me, Doctor?” Ray asked the psychiatrist.
“Well, you are what is called ‘bi-polar,’” the doctor replied.
Ray stared at him. Was this the bane that had played havoc with his emotions through the years? he wondered. What can I do about it?
For years something had played havoc with Ray’s emotions, hurting his life and relationships with others. What’s wrong with me? he had often wondered.
Ray had suffered a troubled childhood and youth. Traumatic experiences had filled him with turmoil, anger, frustration, and fear. When he was nineteen, he looked up to the Lord and cried, “If you will save me and come into my life, I will live for you!” After that he knew he belonged to the Lord and had more peace.
Several years after he married, however, the pressures in his life assailed him. Continual back pain and nervous tension put him in the hospital. Later, fusion surgery on his back kept him from work for three months. Financial problems beset the family. He felt a complete failure.
Six years later, when another fusion surgery didn’t take, Ray had to go on social security disability. Life became a nightmare for him then! Doubts assailed, depression crushed him. He couldn’t sleep. His doctor had him on four medications–Darvon, Meprobamate, Valium, and Dalmane, which had a hypnotic effect on him.
“Oh Lord!” he cried in anguish, “I’m barely living!” Anger about his whole life raged within him. Remembrance of his childhood and youth flooded back and haunted him. His anger spilled over on his family, making him impossible to live with. So his wife asked him to leave.
Two months later Ray walked the floor like a caged cat, angrily shaking his fist at God. Then he tried to pray, but couldn’t. After hours of this, in anguish he gave up and fell to his knees crying, "Lord, I can’t go any further. If you will help me, I’II try to straighten out my life!"
Getting up, he took all the pills and threw them into the commode. His drug-befuddled mind began clearing.
Seeking Help
The next day Ray called his pastor and asked for counseling. Since his pastor had also suffered a back problem, he could relate to Ray’s physical pains. He understood the anger and frustration Ray felt in his heart. When the pastor had experienced those same feelings, however, he had dealt with them in a Biblical way. This he shared with Ray.
"Ray, in order to have peace and victory, you must trust the Lord completely, even though you don’t understand everything," he advised. "Believe He will work all things out for good in your life. And you must forgive all those who have ever hurt you, in order to rid yourself of the deep-down hostility in your heart."
By following this advice, Ray found peace in spite of his circumstances.
Good Advice
The pastor also advised, "When you get angry, don’t take it out on anyone. Keep it inside until you can properly vent it. Go outside and kick a tree, yell at the wind, get it out. Pray and ask the Lord to help you with the anger." He also suggested that Ray go to school to fill his time with something constructive, to get his mind off himself. So Ray enrolled in several courses at a local technical school.
Through his pastor’s Bible-centered counseling Ray began to look at life in a new way. But he missed his family. So Ray shortly before Christmas sat down and wrote his wife a long letter.
Oh dear Carolyn, please forgive me! I have gotten right with the Lord and have been getting some great counseling from our pastor. And I have earnestly tried to correct the problems in my life with the Lord’s help. It seems like a miracle, but that anger that once filled me and made me so miserable is gone. Please, I beg you to consider taking me back. I miss you all so much!”
On Christmas day, after he exchanged presents with his wife and sons, he received the greatest Christmas present next to Jesus. His beloved wife agreed to take him back. It wasn’t easy for either of them for a while, but with the insight Ray had gained from counseling, he had more understanding. His mind was also clearer, no longer befuddled by the medications.
Their pastor told them to support one another, help one another, talk things out–so they did. He had told Ray, "Your wife is a stable person and can help you if you will listen to her." So Ray did.
Learning New Ways
The reunited couple spent time together and did thoughtful things for each other. Ray would have a cup of coffee awaiting Carolyn when she got home from work. And he learned how to cook so that he could make the meals for the family.
Ray’s relationship with his sons improved because he listened to his wife, who said, "Spend time with them." Instead of thinking of himself, he was thinking more of his family.
On his pastor’s advice Ray also went to see the psychiatrist who had diagnosed his malady. "At first that revelation had incensed me," he says, "but then I realized that now that I knew my problem, I could finally learn how to deal with it. One way I do this is by spending an hour a day in prayer, reading my Bible, and fasting once a week. This has helped me tremendously. I learned that God and His Word provides healing for hurtful emotions if we heed them! And I’ll praise Him for all of my days for all He has done for me!”
Note: Ray became a minister and counselor and now passes on to others all he learned.
Question: Tell us how God has helped you in a tough place.
About the Author: http://talk.thelife.com/experience/devotionalformen/authors/muriel-larson/
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